Our calls got shorter
Mia moved to Melbourne for her first job in March. I was so proud of her. I also knew it would take a while to feel at home that far away.
By September our calls had changed. She’d tell me she was fine, just tired. Then one night she let slip that she’d been lying awake most nights, going back over the day.
That’s the hardest part of having your child on the other side of the world. I could hear it in her voice, and I couldn’t do the one thing I’d have done if she were home, which is hug her.
Flowers didn’t feel like enough
I thought about sending flowers. They’d be lovely for a week. I wanted something she’d still be reaching for a month later, on the nights she didn’t feel like talking to anyone.
A friend at work kept a weighted panda on her chair. One afternoon I picked it up and laid its long arms over my shoulders. They settled and stayed there. I sat like that for a minute and felt held.
Why being held helps when you can’t switch off
Before I sent it, I wanted to know why it felt like that, so I read up.
When you’re stressed or can’t sleep, your body stays braced, as if it’s waiting for something to go wrong. Your shoulders creep up and your mind keeps running. Being held by someone you love is one of the oldest ways a body learns it can stop bracing and settle.
The weight in the arms is there to give that feeling back when nobody’s around to hug you. Each animal weighs 2.2 lb (1 kg), and most of that weight sits in the extra-long arms. Lay them over your shoulders and they stay there, pressing down gently and evenly, the way arms around you do. That steady pressure is called Deep Pressure Therapy, the same idea as a weighted blanket.
What mattered most to me was who made it. The animals are developed with a network of therapists, people who spend their working days helping others through stress and anxiety, and they’re CPC and CE safety certified. If I was sending something to my daughter in a hard month, I wanted it made with that kind of care.
The original weighted animal that hugs you back
- Extra-long weighted arms that wrap around them
- 3 free gifts, including a gift bag
- Ship it to them or give it in person
It arrived on a Thursday
I had it shipped straight to her apartment in its drawstring gift bag, and I didn’t say a word about it on the phone.
She opened it that evening, her time. Twenty minutes later my phone buzzed. She’d posted a story: the panda’s arms around her shoulders, me tagged, and three words. “ok I’m crying.”
So was I.
Then it became part of her week
The panda lives on her bed now. She puts it over her shoulders when she’s catching up on emails at night, and it’s what she reaches for when her mind won’t stop at 1am.
Our calls are longer again. When I ask how she’s sleeping, she says better, most nights. She still says she’s fine. I believe her a bit more now.
What people say after the first hug
★★★★★“I didn’t expect to cry the first time I hugged him. It felt like being held for the first time in ages.”
David Chen, 31· Pookie the Panda
★★★★★“I wrap Pookie around me during work and it’s like my body remembers how to breathe again.”
Riley Thompson, 29· Pookie the Panda
★★★★★“Pookie is the hug I didn’t know I needed. He literally melts my stress away. I bring him everywhere.”
Jessica Lee, 27· Pookie the Panda
If you’re thinking of sending one
Here’s what I’d tell anyone with someone they love far away: you don’t need the right words. Every time they pick it up, they’ll know who sent it.
Pick the animal that’s most like them. Put their address in at checkout, or have it sent to you if you’d rather hand it over yourself. It arrives in a drawstring gift bag, so there’s nothing to wrap.
For a limited time, every order also comes with 3 free gifts: the gift bag, a workbook and an audio meditation.
